Yearning of the Heart

While learning the song Nadasousou, I can't help feeling the deep longing of the person who composed those lines in the lyrics:

I whisper "thank you" as I leaf through this old photo album, to the one who always cheered me on, within my heart. And should the memories of that smile I think of, come rain or shine, fade away into the distance, they return in the days I search for a glimpse of your face, a stream of tears.

The memories of that smile I think of, in sorrow or in joy. And if you can see me, from where you are, I'll live on believing that someday we'll meet again...

If only we could meet, if only we could meet, my feelings for you, a stream of tears.

Watashi to shite wa, aitakute, aitakute, kimi e no omoimasu...

(wuff-wuff! whimper~)

A Stream of Tears

Well, no, I'm not experiencing any emotional downturn whatsoever. This is the translation of a Japanese song titled Nadasousou, which is a folk song from Okinawa. And the singer's name is Natsukawa Rimi. For those of you Chinese folks out there, you may be familiar with the Chinese version of this song (though the lyrics and meaning are entirely different from the original) titled Accompanying You to see the Sunrise (陪你看日出), sung by the Singaporean singer Oi Tsai (蔡淳佳).

This is a very beautiful song with soothing musical tones, one which I had long wanted to learn to sing (the Japanese version, of course), but did not take up until now, after a colleague of mine passed it to me for my listening pleasure. So for the next two weeks, it'll be nadasousou for my ears. And once I master it, that'll bring the total number of Japanese songs I've learned to sing by heart to seven.

Subarashii... (wuff-wuff!)

Totto-Chan

Known by its other title, The Little Girl at the Window, Totto­–chan seems to be a collection of Tetsuko Kuroyanagi's childhood memories in the Tomoe Gakuen elementary school.

Based on the dates mentioned in the book, the author must have been in first grade in the year 1943. This was a turbulent time as Japan was engaged in world war with Asia and the US. However, the author is able to divert much of the reader's focus to the happenings within the local scenes of her childhood life without entailing too much on the international conflicts. This has helped to preserve the innocence and simplicity that radiate from each chapter, which makes it hard to put down once you start reading (it took just two evenings to complete the 200 or so pages).

I am quite sure that every reader of this book will find chapters that he or she likes, just as it did for me. The ones that touched my heart are The Headmaster, "Put It All Back!", Totto-chan's Name, The Great Adventure, "We Were Only Playing!", The Hair Ribbon, Health Bark, and "Yasuaki­–chan's Dead". Of course, there are chapters that bring a chuckle or smile as you read, such as "Chew It Well!", The School Song, "Look before You Leap!", "And then...Uh...", His Bride, and "Shabby Old School".

All in all, I find reading this book to be a refreshing experience; at the least, it stirs up the childhood memories we all had, and allows us to withdraw (for a moment) into the inner sanctuary of our souls where we once again discover the innocence and simplicity that we seem to have lost as we grow up.

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This is a wonderful book to read, and for reminding us that every child is special. It matters not whether they are born healthy or handicapped, but whether we are willing to accept them and give them room to grow to their potential.

A Prelude to Totto-Chan

Innocence of childhood

Unregrettable youth

Although passes away with time

But those happy times

and valuable friendships

Yet forever locked within one's memory

So fresh and vibrant

Waiting for you and I to rediscover

Chihiro Iwasaki

In case you're wondering, I'm not referring to the fictional character Chihiro Ogino (bet you didn't know her full name) from Miyazaki's Spirited Away. I'm talking about a real person here, an artist who, after nearly twenty years since passing away, continue to impress and speak to those who come into contact with her works.

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Below is an excerpt of her biography from a website dedicated to her:

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"The most remarkable feature of Chihiro Iwasaki is that she was an artist who continued throughout her career to paint children. Even without models, she could accurately draw the differences between a ten month-old baby and a one year old. Using her keen observation and fine sketching skills, Chihiro drew numerous different poses of children in thousands of works. Without a rough sketch, she would pick up a brush, steep it in water, and move it freely across the paper. Thus, she could express children's skin as it was, soft and elastic, lively and fresh. Her pictures are full of life."

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And you'll agree with me she's quite good at depicting children with all their varied expressions (see inset picture). I get to know her through the book Best of Totto-chan, written by Kuroyanagi Tetsuko (she's another interesting person to know; I'll write a little about her next time). Inside are full of Chihiro's illustrations; if you can, get a copy (mine has Japanese text on the left and English on the right). You'll be glad you did.

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Overtime (or Overdued?)

No, I'm not talking about doing overtime in the office. Back when I'm much younger I used to put in extras, both after office hours and during the weekends. Now, I've learned to slow down and put things in proper perspectives (work, after all, isn't everything).

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I'm reminded of a Japanese TV serial titled Overtime whenever I see the Tokyo Tower (see inset picture). I'll have to admit I can't remember the details, but the one thing that propped up quite prominently is this tower that is visible from the lead actress' bedroom window.

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Granted, the Eiffel Tower in Paris is much older (built in 1889) and far more famous as a distinctive landmark, but it should in no way overshadow the architectural wonders of similar achievements in other lands.

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We humans seem to have an obsession to build anything that can reach the skies and light up the night heavens. But how many of us, in turn, are willing to be that tower that'll light up the dark nights of a friend's heart?

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Watashi wa yono hikari de aru. Watashi ni shitagau mono wa kurayami no naka wo aru kazu, inochi no hikari wo motsu. Go figure!

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Kawaii desu ne...

For those who don't know what the title means, I suppose the picture tells it all.

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Oh, alright, if you still can't figure out, it means: so cute...

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Children, no matter of what nationality, almost never fail to display a certain quality of innocence and charm (unless the parents really spoilt them, of course).

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Still, I am aware that there are just as many children in the world who are suffering from hunger, diseases and war. To these our hearts go out to them, and bleed and cry out for the atrocities committed against them at such a young age as a result of the political situations they are found in.

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But frankly, what separates adults from children? Not much. Adults are just children, with more expensive toys to play with, that's all.

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Hashire, Hashire

The city that we were born in

is a place where I don't understand

While the place where I grew up

is now only a distant memory

Ah... the things that we encountered...

Ah... the people who were worthy of our love...

Mingled together

And now everything becomes a blank.

Ever had the feeling of being isolated from life and neglected by people you cared about? Somehow wishing that for once others would take the initiative to call you out for a cup of tea, and just enjoy being in your company, and not just remembering you because they needed somebody to pour their grievances or share their problems?

I guess it's not just the ever-changing landscapes of modernisation that rob us of the memories of our childhood days; even the people we grew up with (and work with presently) are either out of touch or becoming distant and cold. We can be living in a crowded place and yet feel alone; we can have many friends and yet feel forgotten.

Sigh... shikata ga nai ne!

Three Kingdoms

A few days ago, a colleague of mine passed me some music CDs which are a collection of Japanese anime theme songs. One of them happened to be the ending song for the Three Kingdoms animation series. For the benefit of those who are not familar, this part of China's turbulent era was set in 220-280 AD, and it describes the struggle for power and dominance between three kingdoms: Wei, Shu and Wu. Besides the gallant warriors and brilliant strategists of that time, the loyalty that existed between ruling warlords and their subjects, and undying friendships between bosom friends, are most profoundly and evidently set forth.

The song entitled The Wind as told by the Flowers, sung by the renown Japanese artist Tanimura Shinji for his soothing voice, is most beautiful. I've translated the lyrics of the first stanza from Chinese (which was translated originally from Japanese), though it does not bring out the full intended meaning as much as I'd like (still, I've tried my best):

The wind is howling over the sorrows and sadness of this world;

Within the dark and silent embrace of the constellations

If we lay bare our hearts, fountains of boiling scarlet

Will flow together into that gigantic, churning torrent.

Life is like a dream, so illusive and unpredictable;

Life is like a dream, so living and real.

Ah...who can tell?

Ah...even the flowers that shall wither tomorrow doesn't know!

and the ending goes like this...

The country is doomed, the citadel's breached,

And the grass is withered; but the wind continues its howling.

Ah...nobody knows the form of the wind;

Ah...the flowers shall convey the form of the wind.

Somehow, it's not hard to sense the emotional upheavals experienced by these ancients as they engaged in life and death battles, and witnessed the changing scenes around their lives of which they had no control over. It is so well expressed by the wind, which has no form but is capable of great changes and impact; and only the flowers' petals, swirling under its influence, is able to give it a visible expression, which otherwise would remain unseen by the human eye.

Ps: This will be the next Japanese song I'll be learning. Ganbatte ne!

Wanna Stay with You...

I've a hard time trying to think of a title for this article which I am about to write, so I turned on Winamp to listen to a little music, hoping to get some inspiration. The first song that came up was "Lion Heart" and the prelude was in English containing the above phrase. How appropriate, I thought!

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Well, today is the last day of stay for my nephew. He was unusually quiet as the evening approached, and when dinner was served, he did not display the good appetite he did the past couple of days. He just hastily finished his meal, went straight to my bedroom, lied on my bed and buried his face between the pillow and bolster. I don't really know what to make of it at first, thinking he was probably tired and want to take a nap before I send him home.

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It was only when my mum had cut some fruits and brought it to him, that I sensed something wrong when she delayed in coming out. When I went in to take a look, I saw that he was crying while mum was trying to console him. It turned out that he felt sad to have to leave us, but it can't be helped because the next day he needs to go back to school. Can't really blame him for reacting this way, because the past couple of days he's been sleeping in my room, and I'd shared my MP3 player with him, listening to those favourite Japanese songs, and singing him to sleep (I used to pat him to sleep sometimes when he was still a baby). I guess the bond between him and me is still there after all these years (sniff!).

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Anyway, I reminded him that he'll be going to junior high next year, and is no longer a boy but a teenager, so he should learn to be strong and independent. Compared to me, he is fortunate to have a grandma to visit and taste her cooking; when I was about a year old, my grandma already passed away so I didn't even get to see her in person. Moreover, it's not the last time he's coming to visit, and when he's more grown up he'll have the opportunity and freedom to visit us anytime. Those reasonings somehow fixed the leak.

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I guess it's never easy to say goodbye, especially for someone his age. And that'll only make our hearts to long to see him again. Until then...

Look who's coming over to stay...

My nephew (my sister's firstborn) had just finished his sixth grade final exams, and decided to put up at my place for a couple of days. His grandma (my mum), of course, is delighted. Standing at slightly over five feet and weighing about 110 pounds (he inherited his dad's heavy bone set physique), I can only wonder how much he's grown these years.

Back when he was just a newborn baby, he already weigh about 7.5 pounds (which is quite heavy for an asian). My sister used to deposit him at our place during the weekdays for my mum's safekeeping, as both she and my brother-in-law are working. I remembered rushing home from work just to take over the babysitting chore. Usually, I'd bring him out of the house just so my parents could enjoy some quite moments (he's a very noisy bundle then, but now he speaks little, engrossing himself with books or his favourite gameboy exploits - pokemon 'fireRed version', whatever that means).

I would normally choose a spot in front of shop houses, and let him sit on my lap watching all the bustling activities. He'd point at something that caught his attention, and I'd explain as best I could to him (I wasn't sure how much he'd understood, though, but who cares?). You may think that seemed like a waste of time, sitting there with a baby watching the crowd for an hour or so on ends. Well, maybe so, but hey, he's the first nephew I'd got back then, and nothing beats cuddling him close to me and observing his acute responses to the surrounding changes. At least it's better than letting the TV set do the babysitter's job, right? So it's no wonder that he's more attached to me than any other uncles he has.

And for that, I've taken a day off from work just so I can spend some quality time with him. I suppose that's the least an uncle should do, and he happens to be my favourite nephew (grin!).

Lion Heart

If you think the content of this article has to do with King Richard I and his famous crusades, then I'm sorry to disappoint you. I'm not an avid student of history, though I scored an 'A' for this subject in my junior high school years.

So what is it all about? Well, to begin with, it's a song (and a Japanese one too) by a group called SMAP which hit the top chart when it was released in 2000, and further popularized when one of the group member, Tsuyoshi Kusanagi, starred in a TV series Food Fight which has this song at it's ending. That's where I heard it for the first time and thought it was quite a nice song, though I didn't think of buying the album for keepsake.

It was not until five years later (which is really only recently) during one of those pressurizing moments of work, that the music of this song suddenly just started playing in my head, I thought to myself, "Hey, I need to learn this song." And you know what? It took me just three weeks to be able to sing it by heart; not the shortest time record though (that'll have to be Teresa Teng's japanese rendition of the chinese song I Only Cared About You, which took me two weeks).

The lyrics of the beginning stanza is really nice (don't worry, I'll put it in English for all you readers):

You're always my medicine box

How do you heal me?

Laughing beside me, look at that smile

And when you cry, tears really do fall.

Call me sentimental, but I think these are the simple little things that makes life bearable and worthwhile, because they are more than words could describe, or wealth could obtain. Sometimes in our bid to secure a better future, we lose something more precious in the process; and the saddest part is we may not even realize it until it is too late. Perhaps it is good to once a while take stock of our lives, and see if we have neglected those who are dear to us, whose simple expressions of care and concern are the daily showers and sunshine of our souls, and learn to appreciate such unreserved kindness which enables us to love in return.

Yes, it takes courage to love. It takes a Lion Heart (pronounced Raion HAATO in japanese).

Birthday in Absentia

No, it's not my birthday today. It's someone else's...someone whom I've regarded as a friend, whose simple words and little gestures can bring a sense of delight even on a day when I feel down and out.

Last year on this day, I gave her my first present - a pencil portrait of the two main characters (Haku and Chihiro) from the movie 'Spirited Away', all neatly framed up, and a ticket that entitled her to a personal rendition of the song Itsumo Nando Demo (which took me almost two months to learn and sing by heart).

This year, I bought her a book (after letting her choose from one of three sealed envelopes to determine what she will be getting for her birthday; she picked the book). But she did not turn up for work since yesterday, neither did she notify me of her absence.

The only thing I could do was to leave the wrapped birthday gift on her desk before I left the office today. But she'll have to wait till Monday, though...and I won't be in office on that day (as I'm working on a project somewhere else).

I remember part of the song goes something like this:

sono mukou de kitto anata ni aeru

Well, I'm not going to explain what that means, but if you understand what true friendship really is, then no explanation is really necessary. As for now, I can only wonder...

Still, o-tanjyoubi omedeto gozaimashita (to my friend, that is...)

Anonymous Publicity

(Pun intended for the title above. Copyright of author here, unless someone already beat me to it - grin!)

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Since publishing my blogs on the web, I've received a number of comments from my visitors. Besides those sincere appreciations and encouragements that prodded me to write further, I noticed something rather odd, or should I say, disturbing...

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Generally, we all agree that freedom of speech and expression are two valuable assets that help people grow and interact without fear, if such freedoms are used responsibly. This is the reason why I've enabled the 'Allow anonymous comments' option in my blog - to spare my readers the pain of having to register as a member in order to share their thoughts about my articles. Unfortunately, to date I've received a few anonymous comments that made use of my blogs to link to their commercial websites. This is, to me, an unacceptable (if not unethical) practice. I have since deleted these from my blogs.

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Any person who cares enough to share their thoughts and emotions in their own blogspots should be treated with some degree of respect and dignity, instead of being exploited by others for personal monetary gains. A person's lifestory is a sacred sanctuary that should not be desecrated, because that lifestory has the potential of making a difference in another's life. My earnest advice to all my readers is, if you have a fair comment to post, by all means do so; but please don't include links to any website that carries commercial interests (I can make do without such publicity, thank you), because most assuredly comments of such nature will only end up in one place - the trash can.

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Now that I've make clear my point, I do hope that people who happen to drop in will find some inspirations from the things that I shared, and if you do find my blog a nice place, feel free to visit as often as you want to: I'll be most glad to play host to you.

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onegai shimasu!

Chain Reactions

Recently, our public utilities board announced a 7% price hike in the electricity charges, citing the reason being the increase in oil prices. This brings to mind a recent TV news broadcast on the devastating effects of hurricane Katrina on the state of New Orleans in the US. Being on the other side of the world (Asia), catastrophies of such nature in gigantic proportion seem so remote to us, even though many of us sympathized with the victims.

However, the truth is we are living in an ever-shrinking earth, in which the repercussions of what happens in one part of the world, may just ripple its way across the globe. Such is the case with hurricane Katrina, and also the more recent Rita. Fears of oil fields stopping production due to the foul weather has sent the already high petroleum prices soaring further. Inadvertently, all industrialized countries which rely heavily on oil import felt the economic backlash. And once utilities and public transport charges go up, the cost of daily necessities of life will follow. One thing leads to another, just like a chain reaction...

So what important lesson does the Katrina episode has to teach us? On a worldwide scale, we are not isolated, neither disaffected by what happens to other people. There is a need to respond to such incidents instead of choosing to be morbid or indifferent, because one day when such a thing happens in our backyard, it may be our turn to depend on others to give us a helping hand. Closer to home, each of us need to realize that we cannot take things for granted, as if what we have and enjoy today will always be there indefinitely. The tides may change, and then suddenly we'll wake up to the fact that what we think we're entitled to, isn't.

Everyday from now on, we should learn to treat people nicely, especially those who care enough about us to share their lives with ours. It's better this way, don't you think so?

dozo okarada o taisetsu ni.

Who says it's just a Dog's Life?

As mentioned in my previous blog, here is the story of Hachiko (as told in the movie)...

Hachiko was born in northern Japan in November 1923 from a special breed of dog known as Akita (秋田犬). When he was a few months old, he was sent by train to Dr. Ueno Eizaburo who lived in Tokyo. The professor lived with his wife and daughter, along with two house servants who attended to the daily chores. When his daughter was married off, there was a void in the old couple’s lives; this was when Hachiko began to come into the professor’s life.

During the university vacation the professor would often bring Hachiko out for a walk around the neighborhood; and when school reopened, Hachiko would follow him to the Shibuya station as he commute to work in the morning; in the evening, Hachiko would wait at the same station for the professor to return. They built up a relationship so strong that, at one point, when the professor’s daughter came back with her husband and their new born child for a visit, he was carefully picking out fleas from Hachiko that he hardly paid any attention to his grandson…

On that fateful day of May 21, 1925, as usual the professor was preparing to go to work. But Hachiko sensed something amiss and was not his normal self. He let out a whimper as he watched the professor went through the station’s gates. That morning, the professor collapsed in class while giving a lecture and was pronounced dead. Hachiko waited at the station that day and when the professor did not show up, he ran back home only to see the undertakers bringing back the casket which the professor was laid in.

During the funeral service, when relatives and friends of the late professor came to pay their last respect, Hachiko suddenly rushed to the altar front and began to mourn for his owner. When the professor’s wife saw that, tears flowed down her cheeks. The day when the professor was to be buried, Hachiko was chained to his kernel. As the casket vehicle was leaving for the cemetary, Hachiko tried frantically to free himself; the chain broke and Hachiko leaped over the gate just in time to send the professor one last time.

Hachiko was arranged to be given away to a relative, but he was not properly taken care of there (he was chained outside the house and exposed to the weather). So he ran back to the late professor’s house. After some time, the grief–strickened wife of the professor decided to sell the house, so she dismissed the two servants. She left Hachiko in the care of an old neighbor family, but when the old neighbor died his wife also moved away. Still, Hachiko would wait at the station every day. When the late professor’s wife saw the loyalty of Hachiko, she wanted to bring him to stay with her at her son-in-law's home. Hachiko, however, wanted to stayed at the station, so he avoided her till she gave up finding him.

Hachiko’s vigil at Shibuya station lasted nearly ten years. During this time, he attracted attention from the media and people who marvelled at his loyalty. On 8 March 1935, during one winter night, as health began to fail him, Hachiko cried out to his owner at the station gate. Suddenly, he caught sight of the professor who lovingly called out his name and beckoned him to come. With longing joy, Hachiko ran and leaped into the embrace of the professor and was finally united with his owner—in death.

These are some highlights of the movie; there are also other enjoyable snippets which I’ll leave you to see for yourself (if you can find the tape, that is). The ending song is also quite beautiful, so don’t miss it.

It is my hope that Hachiko will find a place in your heart just as it did mine, and that the message of true loyalty will always be there to keep you company, even in life’s darkest hour…

monogatari o tanoshinda desu ka? wuff-wuff!

Hachiko Monogatari

Today, I'll like to share a little about Hachiko. The name I've chosen for my blog (see title above) translated means The Story of Hachiko. The truth is, Hachiko is not a person, as most native Japanese will tell you, but a dog (more accurately, an Akita inu).

My first encounter with Hachiko was back in 1990 when I saw the movie (in Japanese with English subtitles) on TV. It brought tears to my eyes and left a deep impression in my heart. Then I caught a second TV screening of the same movie a few years later (by accident) and again it moved me to tears. Fast forward to the year 2004; a new colleague of mine introduced me to the masterpiece of Japanese Anime, Spirited Away, by Hayao Miyazaki.

Somehow, that brought back memories of Hachiko and I started a search for the movie (at local video stores and on the internet) which lasted almost two months. You wouldn't believe how difficult it was to find that movie (made in the year 1987) considering it was a classic in Japanese culture and heritage.

I was on the verge of giving up when finally, I found it on an online Japanese media store (in one of their undisclosed web pages). It was in VHS (mono, without English subtitles) and cost me 2,980 yen. I had it converted to VCD, which cost me another 22 bucks, but I felt all the troubles and expenses that I've been through were worth every bit.

And you know what? After watching the same movie for the third and subsequently, fourth time, I found myself still unable to control my tears from falling. After all these years, the story of Hachiko still touches the soft spots in my heart (and I suppose it always will be).

Well, maybe I'll let you in on the details of the story on my next blog.

Till then...wuff-wuff!

Once in a Blue Moon...

It's been quite a while since my first blog. Work has been quite pressuring lately as the deadline approaches; besides there are a couple of matters that needed my attention, and before I realize it, almost a month has passed.

Come to think of it, why the phrase "Blue Moon" and not any other colors? Hmm... anyway, just remembered celebrating the Mid-Autumn Festival about a week ago. The Chinese believes that the Moon is brightest and roundest on that day (er, I mean night) of the year. Of course, there are the mooncakes: oishii desu ne! (Nowadays there are so many different flavors that even Baskin-Robbins pale in comparison (wink). But I still prefer the traditional kind with lotus or red bean paste; I can do without the egg yolk even though I don't have high cholesterol or weight problem, honest). I brought my three young nephews out for an evening walk with their lanterns (so my sister could have a break and enjoy some quiet moments), and got to see the moon in its pristine beauty.

Since ancient times, mankind has always been fascinated by this object which looms in the night sky. The Chinese are especially endeared to it, judging from the number of folklores invented since days immemorial, and all the beautiful poetry composed by renown poets and scholars of yester-years. Personally, I've memorized a couple of them, and believe me, there's nothing quite like feeling the emotional sentiments of those past sages as they gazed upon that same moon we see today...

We're told by our science and history books that man succeeded landing on the moon in the year 1969. Well, if that's true, then we've really done a great disservice to our future generations by taking away the wonder and mystery that surrounds it. I mean, who would've bother to take a second look at the moon, which is nothing but a chunk of cosmic rock ridden with pock marks, that satellites itself around the earth? The funny thing is, I've come to realize that there are people out there who don't really believe in the Apollo sagas. Now, before I get a deluge of comments or involve in unsolicited arguments, just pay a visit to this website if you want an alternative view (I think everyone should be given a chance to weigh all evidences and not be force-fed by media propaganda, ya?):

http://www.ufos-aliens.co.uk/cosmicapollo.html

Don't get me wrong. I'm for science; but unfortunately there are many things out there in the world that pose themselves as science, but in actuality are just pseudo-sciences. You know, these days science is stranger than fiction. And it all started with the "Blue Moon"...

Chikaiuchi ni omeni kakarimasu.